I can’t believe that I’ve been married for 9 years!?!? It feels like yesterday and I can honestly say, it was the greatest gift God has given me, which was the beginning of God’s calling for my life and the greater gifts to come.
After 9 years, what can I say about marriage, my marriage, Richard Adamson II?
Here’s what I posted on Facebook that sums it up perfectly:
“Screaming Happy Blessed 9th Anniversary to my soulmate, the one that makes my heart skip a beat, my very nearest and dearest best friend.
We’ve been through the fire, rain, the valley of death, sickness and everything you can think of and God has always helped us honor our commitment first to Him and to each other. What we’ve gone through would have pulled most people apart from the conception… BUT GOD. Christ has always been our foundation and glue that has held us together.
Marriage is not easy, staying in love is not easy, being a family in ministry is definitely not easy. The cross we bear sometimes is hard and crushing, but what is easy is loving you! Loving and caring for you is my delight. Valuing and cherishing who you are, the loving and tender Man that God made you is an honor and gift. I’d walk through the fire, hell, fight all manner of devils and demons and move the earth for you and to preserve what God has given us.
There is no one on the face of the earth I’d rather fight the good fight of faith with, no one I would rather walk through jail halls to minister to the afflicted, no one I’d rather be with as we minister to the dying. Our ministry is tough, it’s real ands sometimes, we’re pressured on all sides, but God truly has His hand on us and it’s my life’s joy and honor to be called your wife. Fellow Comrade and my earthy King, it’s my life joy to share all of life’s gifts, valleys and surprises along side you. I appreciate how you love me and care for our family, PRICELESS! My Dad Pete would be so proud of the man you’ve become and how you take care of his family!!! Always and forever in Christ my King, Happy 9th Wedding Anniversary, Richard Adamson II. More to Come…”
So, what can I say about marriage?
Honestly and truly for us, Christ is truly, TRULY the foundational piece that holds our marriage together. Some may disagree and say that’s not enough and yes, there’s other components to marriage, but, at the end of the day, it all starts and ends with Christ.
In marriage, life happens, looks change, our bodies change, likes and dislikes change, personalities change, family dynamics change, stress happens, finances happen, sex does or doesn’t always happen, people change, life changes, death happens, infidelity happens, sickness happens, kids happen, spiritual attacks and warfare happens, all types of traumas, highs, lows, likes, dislikes all seem to happen and sometimes, all at the same time. We’ve been through A LOT of these types of things early in our marriage and honestly, our courtship and marriage has been tested and survived through fire and sometimes, it was only Christ that kept us going.
Early in our courting stages as we were still trying to figure out God’s will for marriage, I remember The Lord sending me a dream. In reality, I had my checklist of all the things I was looking for from a future husband, which I must admit, was superficial. When I looked at my Richard back then, in my natural and delusional eyes, I couldn’t check off some of those things I was looking for in a husband. Over time, I began to doubt if we were the right match initially. I presented before the Lord the desires of my heart but, not everything I was looking for lined up, so I began to doubt what God was doing.
I remember in the dream, I was staring at Richard while I was talking to God. I said to The Lord, “Lord, he’s a great man with so much to offer, but, he doesn’t have this…he doesn’t have that…this is wrong, that’s wrong…I don’t like this, I don’t like that…”
In the dream, for every time I told God what was wrong, The Lord would say, “look again!”
As I looked at Richard, He was ministering to a young girl The Word of God and my heart fell in love with him. After looking for a while, I’d take my eyes off him again and started complaining to The Lord. Every time I took my eyes off to complain, The Lord would say, “Look again!” Needless to say, this complaining session went on for a while until He made it click for me. Every time I saw Richard ministering, I fell deeper and deeper in love with him. The Lord was telling me it’s not what Richard had or didn’t have, but what was important was WHO God made him and His heart for Him, for God, it was all about Richard’s heart.
What I’ve learned before marriage was to stop looking for superficial things in a man and to look for the heart of God and the things that we’re important to God instead of ALL the things I wanted. I learned that sometimes, The Lord will send the man glistening with all the bells and whistles or, he’ll send him rough around the edges needing a woman’s help to become a diamond.
At that time, my heart yearned for secular things that today and through life’s storms, I realize aren’t really that important. What God was trying to send me was a man after His own heart and with enough unconditional love, commitment and kindness to love me pass my weaknesses, later sickness and my morbid obesity. He sent me someone who would honor him and care for my delicate heart and the little wounded Ke’Shawn within me, someone that understands and cherishes me.
I learned then that the things we look for in people can be pretty shallow, conditional and superficial, but God sees the bigger picture…The Lord looks at the heart and He’ll send what we need, not always what we want. When Christ looks at us, He sees all He created in us and our greatest potential and at the right time, He sends people to help birth and bring out the best in each of us.
There’s a entire book I could write about this particular topic, so stay connected for the continuation of this post, “Celebrating 9 Years of Marriage in Christ…Richard & Ke’Shawn’s Reflections” Part 2.
Enjoy our short little video of JUST US!
Yours in Christ,
Ke’Shawn Adamson
B.O.O.M!
