Death and suffering were the two main ingredients God truly used to teach me about the importance of where I allowed my mind to dwell and where I put my focus. It was during my time of loss that He showed me how detrimental it could be for my survival and fulfilling His purpose for my life if I didn’t change how I viewed things and where I allowed my mind to dwell. For the first time of my life, I was better able to handle my grief and loss and it was this understanding that sparked the beginning of fulfilling the call of Christ on my life.
Philippians 4:8-9
8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise .9 Whatever you have learned or received….put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
It wasn’t until I was faced with despondency and grief that forced me to be mindful of my focus…last year when my Uncle passed, I could feel myself slipping away…I felt like I was losing myself in despondency and going down a deep dark bottomless pit…the would of’s, should of’s, could of’s just wouldn’t let me rest…I was beyond grief stricken and suffering from post trauma from all I’d been through…I felt like I was etching away…similar to what I felt when my father passed away…once again…God stepped in and truly ministered to me.
At that time, all The Lord seemed to minister to me about was realigning my focus…realign my focus…realign my focus…I felt like ‘s-e-r-i-o-u-s-l-y, I’m in pain and you’re speaking to me about realigning my focus, I need YOU to address my pain’…I truly struggled with how He was ministering to me…He kept giving me Philippians 4…In my prayer time, He was talking to me…but He wasn’t talking to me about what I was feeling…I honestly felt He wasn’t giving my feelings enough attention…I knew God cared, but was upset that He wasn’t talking to me about what I was feeling…He ministered to me about everything else but what I was feeling…He wasn’t coddling me as He had in the past and I needed to be coddled….I was pretty salty and frustrated with Him about it…
I’ve learned some things since then…He was teaching me a bigger lesson…He was teaching me how to survive…He cared about my pain, truly cared, He let me know He hurt with me, but at that time, His biggest concern was pulling me out of grief and despair…in the midst of my pain…He didn’t tell me what I wanted to hear…He told me what He needed from me…and at that time it sounded insensitive…but really, He was helping to save my life and get me higher in Him.
In order for me to go where He’s trying to take me, He needed and still needs me to get this lesson…FOCUS ON ME…FOCUS On Your FAITH…If I don’t get this lesson now, at this level, once He takes me higher, if I don’t learn how to get my FOCUS right, when life happens, it will topple me…higher level, new devil…this principal will keep me when greater storms come…so at that time in my life, His message to me was more important than what I thought I needed from Him.
He needed me to focus…I have a family…I can’t go down the street of despondency and despair….I can’t let what happened in the past consume me into paralysis…I have a purpose upon the earth…I have a calling…He needed me to feel what I needed to feel, cry out to Him, allow Him to deal with my loss and heal the trauma, but then, after everything was said and done, He needed me to rise out of my ashes…FOCUS on the bigger picture, Focus on His goodness…Focus on the good of that situation…FOCUS on what He felt was important and take those things I couldn’t change and surrender it at His feet, making my peace with it and His sovereignty…it was in that process…I found and continue to find my rest.
For a soldier in the middle of a war zone in the heat of battle, he has no time to cry, sit down and wallow, get into frivolous squabbles with his team, worry about small details or allow any one thing to consume his attention…he has to be alert and focused…every moment, every second or every chance he gets, he’s strategizing, he has his eyes on one thing, making it out alive and in one piece.
There are going to be times when life will try to level us…but at some point, no matter how rough it is, He’s given us power to rise again, FOCUS, and finish the race He’s set out for us. In our time of greatest pain, we have to exercise our faith to bring us up and out of our heartache and pain. If we don’t FOCUS On Our Faith and on the goodness of God, we give the devil a legal right to reign, but if we exercise spiritual muscle and FOCUS On Our Faith… those things that are true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, and admirable…those things that are excellent and worthy of praise, God will move and we’ll give Him a justifiable reason to come to our aide and work on our behalf.
It is this principal that has set me on track to locking into the vision that Christ has for my life, learning how to dream again despite my past failures and pain…this principal is focusing me on conquering my obesity and helping me stay committed to that calling towards health and wholeness…I’m learning how to use the Word to renew and wash over my mind to change my perceptions when life happens…I’m far from having arrived…but I’m learning and striving.
It was through learning how to cope with my uncle’s death is why I’m even able to write this post today. This post is in honor of my Uncle, Dudley Andrew Hill, “Drew.” I found my Peace with His death through Philippians 4. Good Friday last year He went home to be with the Lord. His death was the beginning of me finding my life 
again…it was the beginning of my healing over decades of grief and sorrow…it was losing “Drew” that pushed me forward towards the higher calling of Christ.
On his home going anniversary, I won’t think about earths loss, but chose to think of my Uncle’s gain…Heaven…No more tears…no more regrets…no more sorrow or pain…no more suffering…no more struggling…the past is gone…Christ Has Made ALL Things New…”Drew” Is Now Home With JESUS…COMPLETE Rest…New Life…New Home…Total Freedom. IT IS WELL! ITS IS WELL WITH MY SOUL!
I will leave you with these scriptures:
Matthew 11:28 (NLT)
…“Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.
Revelation 7:9-17(NLT)
9 After this I saw a vast crowd, too great to count, from every nation and tribe and people and language, standing in front of the throne and before the Lamb. They were clothed in white robes and held palm branches in their hands. 10 And they were shouting with a great roar,“Salvation comes from our God who sits on the throne and from the Lamb!” And all the angels were standing around the throne and around the elders and the four living beings. And they fell before the throne with their faces to the ground and worshiped God. 12 They sang,
“Amen! Blessing and glory and wisdom and thanksgiving and honor and power and strength belong to our God forever and ever! Amen….”
They stand in front of God’s throne and serve him day and night in his Temple. And he who sits on the throne will give them shelter. They will never again be hungry or thirsty; they will never be scorched by the heat of the sun. For the Lamb on the throne will be their Shepherd. He will lead them to springs of life-giving water. And God will wipe every tear from their eyes.”
Isaiah 40:1-2 (NLT)
“Comfort, comfort my (daughter),” says your God… (your) sad days are gone and (your) sins are pardoned.
Revelation 21:3-5(NLT)
3 I heard a loud shout from the throne, saying, “Look, God’s home is now among his people! He will live with them, and they will be his people. God himself will be with them.[a] 4 He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things (of the past) are gone forever.”
5 And the one sitting on the throne said, “Look, I am making everything new!”
Philippians 4:6
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.
Jeremiah 29:11 ESV
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.
Matthew 21:22 ESV
And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith.”
Proverbs 18:21 ESV
Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.
Continue to stay with B.O.O.M! The Lord has so much more to say to all of us in our pursuit of freedom.
As always, be encouraged, stay connected, fight and Let’s Become Free Together.
Worship the Lord…It Is Well…Bethel Music
In His Name,
Ke’Shawn Adamson
B.O.O.M!
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