I never realized how much fear ran my life. When a crisis arises, I tend to keep my cool, but recently, fear, panic and worry sprang up in my soul when a certain few situations arose. The fact that I had that type of panic for things I thought I conquered let me know something was wrong and it was God’s way of pointing out a weakness.
Recently, I found myself asking God, “Is fear at the root of my self-sabotaging behaviors that prevents me from becoming who you called me to be? Am I really afraid to become exactly who I see in my mind? Unlock my soul and show me the dead areas in my heart, life and soul that needs excavating.”
As I continued praying, The Lord brought me to my prayer book, “Prayer Rain” by Dr D.K. Olukoya and I started to decree and declare the word of God over those fears. As I was praying, The Lord stopped me and suggested I write down every fear I have and tell it to go.
To my amazement, I had three pages of things that plague my heart. I had worries and concerns that I never knew about or could never really put it into words. I realized for the first time, fear has a strong grip in my entire life. Fear has had a tight grip on most areas from finances, family, death, walking in purpose, my relationship with Christ, my kids, friendships, etc.
Fear has infiltrated my life and corrupted portions of it and I didn’t even know it.
As I studied 1 Samuel, I kept seeing a reoccuring theme in King Saul’s decision making.
1 Samuel 13:1-14
13 Saul was thirty[a] years old when he became king, and he reigned over Israel forty-[b] two years.2 Saul chose three thousand men from Israel; two thousandwere with him at Mikmash and in the hill country of Bethel, and a thousand were with Jonathan at Gibeah in Benjamin. The rest of the men he sent back to their homes.
3 Jonathan attacked the Philistine outpost at Geba, and the Philistines heard about it. Then Saul had the trumpet blown throughout the land and said, “Let the Hebrews hear!” 4 So all Israel heard the news: “Saul has attacked the Philistine outpost, and now Israel has become obnoxious to the Philistines.” And the people were summoned to join Saul at Gilgal.
5 The Philistines assembled to fight Israel, with three thousand[c] chariots, six thousand charioteers, and soldiers as numerous as the sand on the seashore. They went up and camped at Mikmash, east of Beth Aven. 6 When the Israelites saw that their situation was critical and that their army was hard pressed, they hid in caves and thickets, among the rocks, and in pits and cisterns. 7 Some Hebrews even crossed the Jordan to the land of Gad and Gilead.
Saul remained at Gilgal, and all the troops with him were quaking with fear. 8 He waited seven days, the time set by Samuel; but Samuel did not come to Gilgal, and Saul’s men began to scatter. 9 So he said, “Bring me the burnt offering and the fellowship offerings.” And Saul offered up the burnt offering. 10 Just as he finished making the offering, Samuel arrived, and Saul went out to greet him.
11 “What have you done?” asked Samuel.
Saul replied, “When I saw that the men were scattering, and that you did not come at the set time, and that the Philistines were assembling at Mikmash, 12 I thought, ‘Now the Philistines will come down against me at Gilgal, and I have not sought the Lord’s favor.’ So I felt compelled to offer the burnt offering.”13 “You have done a foolish thing,” Samuel said. “You have not kept the command the Lord your God gave you; if you had, he would have established your kingdom over Israel for all time. 14 But now your kingdom will not endure; the Lordhas sought out a man after his own heart and appointed him ruler of his people, because you have not kept the Lord’s command.”
What I’ve noticed in the life of Saul, he was extremely insecure and fearful. All throughout 1 Samuel, he was fearful of something e.g. he hid when it was time for him to be declared Israel’s King, he disobeyed God’s command to kill everything and followed along with the people, kept the goods and kept some people alive, he was fearful of the Philistines which caused him to act hastily and disobey God and, it cost him the Kingdom and God’s favor, he also feared David his servant and tried to kill him constantly causing his own demise etc.
Like Saul, fear can corrupt and damage everything. Has or is fear causing all of us all to sabatage God’s calling and our future? Are we not 100% where we need to be in general, in our purpose or walk with God because of some sort of Fear and discomfort?
When I envision myself, I see this beautiful woman, SLIM, standing before crowds of people as she encourages and ministers to them. I know that woman in my mind, she’s me, the one I’m reaching for but having a really hard time getting her to come out. Today, I’m pulling her out by working on crushing my fears.
What are you afraid of? Is your fear holding you back from something? Do you see yourself and all that you’re called to be? Do you envision more?
I encourage you, write down those things that cause you panic and fear and call it by its name and tell it to go. Don’t stop declaring what it is, telling it to go and speak faith instead. John 16:33 says, “I have told you these things so that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take courage; I have overcome the world!”
We already have overcome in Jesus Name! Let’s resolve to Go after the vision Christ placed in our heart and Let’s CRUSH FEAR TODAY! It’s ours for the taking.
Continue to join me as I share with you what Christ is sharing with me about overcoming. As always, Be Encouraged, Stay Connected, Fight & Let’s Become Free Together!
Yours in Christ,
Ke’Shawn Adamson
B.O.O.M!
